I know Ive been busy but ever since the end of summer, Ive been wanting to do a bunch of reviews soo badly on items that I bought. Some of the things I wanted to do a review on were: NYX round lipsticks (in Narcissus and Circe), the 88 color pallete by Coastal Scents, Revlon Photoready foundation, and alot of Herbal Essences hair products (been obsessing lately). I dont think Ima have time until the Fall semester ends which is in mid December, so be on the lookout (I know Im behind).

Another update

Yeah I havent been on this in a while, especially since now Im back in school or Im probbably using my tumblr account. A lot of stress has been on me from school to other issues to the point that I feel like its eating me alive. Things arent the same between us anymore and i dont know how it got so ugly so quick..shit ima save all that for a poem or somehting haha. But on a serious note, it scares me because of the feelings I have yet at the same time its too much. Im tired of all the people who I love hurting me verbally, pointing out my flaws. This goes for everyone, not a single person. I feel like I cnt be myself anymore. Im not even happy as I used to be but I try to forget it for a while. Sorry if this entry sounds emoesque. Im currently chillin in my student center on campus right now on my netbook. Just havin a cpu on me at times is great. Im still jobless but I think maybe I should focus on my classes first; it really sucks to be broke and ask your folksfor mone..I hate that shit. Im always used to being independent. Im only on three hours of sleep and me being upset doesnt help. I couldnt sleep well last night and Ive been tearing. I just miss how happy things used to be.

btw, i colored my hair back to blue-black haha that is my resort color after i get roots or just ge sick of it haha

heyheyhey

Its been a while since I updated. I honestly dont know why I havent updated lately, because I'm not really that busy. haha. Matter of fact, I am doing nothing productiove this summer. ITs a shame. I havent even went swimming and its already August! LOL I guess its because since I made a tumblr, I would frequently blog on there, but the things I blog on thereare somewhat shorter and more like "facebook" posts & sttuses rather than legit blog entries. I use this to write longer and more profound blogs (if I can).

So, im not sure where to begin. I feel liek lately, its been everyone hating me. I dont know if Im bugging, or wahtnot but even the people who are my friends and family jsut seem like they are tired of me. I jsut hate having that feeling of people no longer having any care nor any admiration for you, because its just a big dissappointment.Maybe I jsut need to relax and stop overanalyzing this.

Things at work has been a pain in the ass lately. My new boss is just competely geting on my nerves, ridiculously rude and says things that are just uncalled for, so I made a bold decision to give in my two weeks. Now,the problem is that I still need to find a job. I need to find one by the time I get back into school because we all know tht being a college student, money is going to be spent liek crazy, especially for stupid books haha ugh. Not even my birthday money could cover everything, but the agian who knows since im taking about 4 classes this semester--one of them being anatomy 2 (repeated with the same professor.eww.) Man, I feel like I could have done more with my summer and I jsut cant beleive its already august.

Besides drama with work, I honestly am not sure how Im feeling. A part of me is depressed, stressed, repressed and hurt, while the other part of me is normal & calm. I just dont know what to do anymore. I need to figure this out on my own. Theres so many issues.

Ive decided to go with this idea of NOT CARING about people (who Ive had a falling out with) and their whereabouts. Well, I have but I always would have someting to say about it. I jsut realized that I need to focus on ME right now and I just ask everyone to just not mention them around me becuase I notice everytime I hear about them, I get angry and upset. I guess its because I'm still hurt by the things theyve done, but at the same time I kind of do forgive them---I just would rather not be associated with them (as friends) anymore...theyre just acquiantances in my eyes. They may be cool with the rest of my friends and family, but it doesnt mean that I need to be. I can be classy, cool and cordial too, but thats it. Its not like we can be the best of friends again because that takes up alot of courage and energy for being able to trust them again,which I dont have, sorry to say. I jsut hate that the people who are our mutual friends may ormight have already told them things about my perosnal business--which i dont appreciate. Its like if I dont care about them and vice versa, waht makes you think that they would care about my life? I think thats how our family firend all the way in Cali(whom I ahvent seen since i was like...4) knows about my personal business because a certian somebody must have told a certain family that I dislike. ANd them knowing that I dislike them and willing to do anything to tarnish my rep and image would be bold enough to stoop so low to tell our other family friends in Cali about my personal business and word gets back to us. ANd, Im pretty sure I know who would tell that family (or at least 1 of their kids) about my personal business because he tends to be a snitch--whther he sees it or not. Now I know which friends I can trust. Its all good. I aint trippin anymore.

Blahh Im tired. I guess I can continue a part two when I have time.

UPdates--part 1

Wow, I havent blogged in nearly a month and a half or so. Funny thing is that I've been on my summer break and havent even yet written one entry; I kept telling myself everyday to write one and now here we are! First and foremost, I havent checked my final grades for the spring semester because I'm just that worried. I really dont wanna fail any classes. Ugh, I cant stand talking about school.

I'm not enjoying waking up at 1 pm everyday because i feel unproductive, yet at the same time I would rather sit at home than to be working (because of the long exhausitng hours). I have plans for this summer, even if it involves me staying home. I have plans on finishing up books that I havent finished since 5 years ago, study for anatomy 2, write some poems, seeing people, and working out, espeically since Ive been getting fat(maybe from drinkin too much soda). Lately, Ive been working 7-8 hour shifts; it's good that I should be getting a sweet paycheck yet at the same time, I'm still broke regardless :( I have beeen spending too much money and Im starting to not have that ability to control it. Dang you, credit card, dang you. Its bad espeically because this month, there's alot of birthdays and i still havent even bought summer clothes yet..maybe a few tops but thats it.

As of lately, I dont understand what's going on in this world. Id rather not go into details, but what gets me feeling so irrate is that after something horrible happened, it is without a question, right for people to sympathize and pay respects. Talking and saying negative things wont help and telling people wrong information doesnt help either. We should just pray for those that are suffering; we need to have compassion. THese old folks that are talking their smack surely have nerve; and they consider themsevles traddtional and supposedly follow our religion deeply. I dont recall bad gossip and not having much compassion a part of religion, especially Buddhism. smh. What a shame. Thats how Cambodians are, and this is the only aspect of our culture that I am ashamed of. As Cambodians, we cant even help each other out; instead, we talk smack. Grow up.Its not the time to hate and talk smack especially if they dont know what is going on. May God and Lord Buddha bless those that are currently suffering right now; these people are in my prayers and my condolences to their families. ♥